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20th April 2026 | thoughts on hedonism I

i used to have an internet acquaintance, a young woman from london. she was my age, and also wasn't entirely happy with the trajectory of their life. she was quite wealthy, a little pampered even, and she did many things that i found thoroughly unpleasant. mainly involving irresponsible sexual acts and heavy drug use. her politics were similarly confounding - economically conservatively, but socially liberal. that is fundamentally retarded.the characteristic i hated most was the fact that she would actively shield herself from something that even slightly discomforted her, a complete refusal to engage with anything new or difficult. a life of total indulgance and no self-discovery. she shoplifted clothes (which surely should contradict her economically conservative viewpoints, no?), binged on alcohol whenever she was anxious, and would partake in minor sexual acts for any man she was acquainted to, even if she disliked them - just for a momentary burst of pleasure. no concern for the long term consequences of her behaviour. this is what I believe hedonism to be, and I have an intense dislike for people who follow that way of living.

the final straw for me in that relationship was when she found a little bit of cocaine under the bed that had been there for months, refused to clean it out, and then just fucking SNORTED it even when i was activity warning her not to for her own safety (it was not in one of those little bags either, it was just a bit of white powder on a book or something, exposed to god knows what). it was awful. and for what? a weak buzz? it made me realise that this woman had no standards for anything and was not worth my time. this is why i do not approve of hedonism. it indicates a lack of humanity, not wanting to engage with the world around you in any meaningful way. pleasure should be derived from fulfilling ones own desires, and building upon meaningful relationships. this should be obvious, but clearly some people reject the human fundamentals they are taught.